Action.

On Friday, he was hungry. And he was very angry regardless thinking how tired I am for having class that morning. He still with his Friday behavior. While eating, I was excitedly told him that I've emailed the skr by myself and with annoying face that he said "oh my god aliya" as if it was just a simple thing. What were you so excited about?

On Saturday, I was wearing a blouse which I never bring to UM. And I even wear it for the second time. I asked him "if this blouse okay?" And he told me "I've already saw you in this blouse. It is okay" I was wondering when was it and we we're arguing that he never saw me in this blouse because it was my second time wearing it. Eventually, he kept saying that he already saw me in this blouse so I just kept quiet because, he's the boss. He needs to win. 

The day after the shake incident, things were getting worse. Sometimes, I felt like I am just a doll or puppet something. That he can just throw away or take it anytime he wants. 

I guess on monday's night we're eating nasi arab. Well i was eating cause he finished earlier. Then if he said something hurtful and my face changed or what, he would say that "i am still angry and i dont forgive you yet. Remember that" then I have to let things go, and pretend like nothing happen. And do whatever he said. 

While eating last night, I was telling him how hurt my heart was when my dad didnt replied my text. "He didnt reply my text when I asked for money. He doesnt give me any money but he can just simply buy pampers and what not" then the most hurtful answer was "how do you know he was buying pampers? Amenda la you ni" with fake laugh. And I've told him "takkanla tak beli pampers, budak tu nak berak dekat mana atas katil?" Then he answered me "What if he was sleeping or buying milk?" To be honest, I was surprised. Really really shocked with his answer like I kept silent for a few mins. My brain couldnt work for awhile thinking of his answer then we talked about something else. And then I asked him "can i ask you something?" And he said what and I knew at first he thought about the topic that we spoke before this but when I asked him "why did you told me about milk and stuff. The pampers were knly example" and he laughed and said "i tau you takkan get over selagi you tak menang and tak puas hati"

And again I was shocked, that was not even an argument. I was just stating my complaint to him and what the thing I wanted to win about then? Then I've told him "it's okay. Dont even answer it" then he just kept silent until we talked about sth else. 

And at the gazebo, he was playing dumb ways in my phone and somehow he wss pushing the screen and what not. I just told him "takyahla tekan sangat screen nanti rosak" then he shut the games off and gave the phone back. 

He was laughing with his friends but when I called him, his face was turning angry all of sudden. Ive told him it was nothing then he asked again and i said nothing. And he tweeted "aku sakit hati lagi dengan kau perempuan"

Because of one mistake, he could just put all things together and can make me his puppet. And I am just his puppet. It hurts more than enough actually, and I wish my heart could grow stronger. I hope so.. 

If he reading all this, he would say that "What about my heart? Watching you shake hands with him?" 

And again if he read that one, he would say "you and your negative thought aliya. You and your judgement. You and your assumption"

And again I was the one to be blame of. Eventually it was all my fault 😔